About 2

Despite the many errors and limitations of the “manic” state, this is the state that I prefer to live in. It would be fair to say — even after all these years — that I glorify, celebrate and worship this state. I am not alone in worshiping manic states, by the way. They call it, variously, “The American Dream”, peak-experience, drive, work-ethic or even flow state. A multi-billion dollar self-improvement industry exists to peddle the fantasy of the continuous flow-state, the brainless mind-hack that will bring you boundless success in 20 minutes a day (I am a sucker for these types of things. Some of them might even work, but most are just good copywriting). In terms of bipolar, Ronald Fieve wrote a book about this, purportedly teaching us how to harness this wonderful condition for good. Ronald Fieve is right, of course — it is a condition with great promise — but I just call it an addiction. One that carries over so, so easily, into much more serious conditions such as alcoholism and narcissism. I have been there. I have learned the hard way to be less of an asshole. Fortunately for me, I am not successful enough to be a full-blown narcissist.

“We do not receive wisdom. We must discover it for ourselves, after a journey through the wilderness, which no one else can make for us, and which no one can spare us; for our wisdom is the point of view from which we come, at last, to regard the world” – Marcel Proust

“William James believed, with many another religious thinker, that the sinner is closer to God than the conventionally good man, because life is given us as a passion; it is, as Keats said, a vale of soul-making […] Social discipline weakens and disables, leaving no merit for the virtuous man who is such only because his spirit is too weak to be tempted. This is, no doubt, why saints and apostles more often consort with thieves and prostitutes than with bankers and aldermen” – Jacques Barzum, from a preface in William James’ Varieties of Religious Experience

“There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium; and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is, not how it compares with other expression. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.”– Martha Graham